Youth Art Workshops & Vendor Applications Stinky News 2008 Photos |
The Stinky News |
||
|
Garlic growers across the state are reporting a fine crop in the fields. The hardneck garlics have started to "scape," a process described by Dr. Carl Rosen**, a renowned Garlic Expert who also dabbles in Soil Science at U of M, as "a shameless display of reproduction", in which the plant produces a single flower stalk. But there's something odd about it: this stalk, known as a "scape," starts off as an innocuous pigtailesque curly-que. If not removed—and it should be removed—it coyly makes another curly-que, and another. Then, suddenly, it straightens out, with some varieties achieving a height of over 5 feet. Strange as all that sounds, it gets even stranger. According to Dr. Rosen, "The scape straightens out when it has reached the proper length to act as an antenna to receive the proper frequency for transmissions from the Mother Ship, which is orbiting Earth. You see, garlic reproduces asexually—no cross pollination or even a first date—but it has to get the stimulation, er, I mean SIGNAL to reproduce from somewhere. The scape receives the transmission, and then follows the instructions sent by the Mother Ship to produce miniature garlic bulbs, called bulbils, in the flower pod. Then they take over human bodies." There are coincidental benefits to removing the scapes: "you can use them in stir fry, salad, pesto—almost anywhere you'd normally use garlic cloves," says Rosen, "and the garlic plant puts all it's energy underground into producing large bulbs. Oh, and we save the planet from mindless zombie pod people. Mostly." TOO MANY CHEFS? We've all heard the ancient axiom "Too many cooks spoil the stew." "It ain't necessarily so," says organic farmer Greg Reynolds***, who has served as director of the Garlic Festival's own restaurant, The Great Scape Cafe, since the early 1950s. When Reynolds saw that the kitchen is substantially larger at the festival's new location, McLeod County Fairgrounds, his first thought was that he could recruit even more celebrity chefs. "Let's cram 'em in there and see what happens." Well, "what happens" is an incredible menu of garlicky gourmet grub served from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m. on festival day, August 15th. Here's a roster of the Minnesota Chefs that Reynolds has recruited—many of whom will also present Cooking Demonstrations under the direction of Chef Wranger, Mary Jane Miller.
So, that's nine chefs cooking in one kitchen. Says Reynolds, "If it turns into a food fight, it's going to be a good one!"; and Festival Director Jerry Ford adds, "And we'd like to point out that it's all locally produced food."
You can join in the cooking, too! And win prizes! Go to the website (www.sfa-mn.org/garlicfest)—there's information on the main page and a downloadable entry form. Show off your favorite garlic recipes.
In preparation for the happy hordes of festival followers flocking to Hutchinson for the 4th Annual MN Garlic Festival, AmericInn is offering special weekend rates on their patented "Mephitic-Isolated Rooms"**** And here's a thought: the Luce Line Trail passes mere blocks from the hotel—bike out to Hutchinson for the weekend! The deal:
Yes, the festival has a fan club on Facebook! You can post your own comments, pictures and videos, and keep up with all the latest news.
Here's a suggestion: go to Explore Minnesota's website and list the Festival a one of your favorite things to do! You can post pictures and videos, and let everyone know just how much it stinks.***** * Our Etymological Editor wishes to point out that there are actually three separate versions of this word: odoriferous, odiferous, and odorous. All three are equally applicable to the festival. ** Disclaimer: The remarks attributed to Dr. Rosen bear no resemblance to anything he actually said. *** Disclaimer: Greg Reynolds never said any of this tripe either. **** Disclaimer: And we made up the bit about "mephitic-isolated rooms," but they do have great sound isolation in them. ***** Again, from the Etymological Editor: "The term 'stink', and it's myriad derivations and conjugations (stank, stunk, stinkin', stinkalicious, etc.) are, in the context of MN Garlic Festival, considered terms of highest praise, even endearment.
|
|||